Parsha Ki Tetzi opens with, when you go to your war with your enemy and you see a beautiful captive woman, and you desire her and you take her. You bring her to your house, cut her nails, have her cry for her mother and father. After a month, you can take her.

The Ramban asks the Jewish question: “What if she is  ugly”.  The Ramban says the key is that you have to desire her. In your eyes. Even further, he notes that you cannot take her for your father or brother.  She is yours if you desire her.

How strange. Does this not contradict all tenets of the Torah. The tenet of virtue, morality, not taking advantage, overcoming your inclination?

The SD would like to comment.   Whether or not she is pretty. YOU desire her.  If you truly desire her, Torah gives you a process to manage your desires.  But it has to be yours, you cannot cheapen her life by passing her on to someone else.  In essence, the Torah recognizes the baser part of our humanity.  We love and want what we want, pretty or not.  We want it. The Torah, gives us a mechanism to control it and reign it in.